"Pondered All These Things In Her Heart" (Embrace the Ordinary vol. 21??)

It has been so long since I've joined Gina for week of Embrace the Ordinary.  But I'm living my ordinary life every day here, so I might as well celebrate it with a blog post :)

There was a time a few months ago when I stepped away from Facebook for two or three weeks.  I only checked it occasionally, and commented on friends posts and photos, but I didn't post anything myself.  

The things I usually post are the silly things my kids say, the exasperating things that they do, the milestones they reach.  I remember a day when Clare said something out-of-this-world cute, and my first thought was, "I'm putting that on Facebook."  I was about to do it right away but stopped.  When did it become a need in me to remind the world how adorable three year olds are?  And my three year old in particular?  

Why was I so compelled to convince everyone how funny, wonderful, cute, etc... my children are?  Isn't the most important thing that I embrace those things?   The quiet moments at home  - when they flub a word, fall on their bum, or put pencils in the freezer to see what will happen - those don't have to be for everyone.  Those sweet moments, the silly faces, the baby's first words, the bear hugs and tender kisses, the hysterical things they say ----- they're for me.  

I thought immediately of Mary when at the Presentation of our Lord, heard the the words of Simeon and "pondered all these things in her heart."  I spent the next few weeks trying to let go of my need to "share" all the Facebook-worthy childhood moments and instead "ponder them in my heart."  

After a few weeks of intentionally keeping the sweet moments for myself, I started to feel like I held a secret treasure deep in my mother's heart.  I had a renewed appreciation for my children and all their antics and all the life and love and joy and craziness they bring to our home - and it wasn't measured by the number of Facebook "likes."  It was a fullness of my heart and a spirit of gratitude for the gifts that my children are to me.  

So... in a funny twist whereby I end this post about "keeping things to myself" and "pondering them all in my heart," I share with you two sweet moments that happened during those few weeks.  These little videos are perfectly representative of the type of moments that I've been holding dear.   I'm sharing these with you as a glimpse of the ordinary moments of motherhood I've been embracing.  But I still have a treasure trove of ordinary moments that I'm holding close -- they're just for me to ponder and love <3

I was cooking dinner and stepped out of the kitchen and couldn't find James when I came back in...

The house was a disaster, dinner was taking forever to make, and Clare was just drawing and singing Soon and Very Soon...

How We Met (In Honor of our Ten Year Anniversary)

Do people actually read these "How We Met" stories?  I confess I've only read a few here and there, and I only sometimes enjoy them.  Our story is suuuuper not exciting and it's only worth writing about because it's ours.  I've avoided writing one until now, but it seemed like the thing to this month to celebrate our ten year anniversary.  (Also, I promised some friends that I was going to work at putting my husband "first" this week, and they're going to be holding me accountable.  So I'm calling this part of my promise... reflecting on our "beginnings" and appreciating how far we've come!)  

So here you have it -- my version of how we met.  And I gave Russ the opportunity to preview it and comment... His comments are in blue. (He's so sweet!)

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How We Met... an Uncomplicated, Fairly Ordinary Love Story

It was my senior year at Franciscan University in Steubenville, Ohio.  I was a Resident Assistant on campus and was about to graduate with my Bachelor's degree in history and French.  I wanted to continue studying history, and I was pretty good at the Residence Life gig, so I managed to get a job as a Residence Director at Franciscan and a fabulous scholarship to Duquesne University, 45 minutes away in Pittsburgh, PA.     

I worked at one university and commuted to study at another for a year.  May, 2001 rolled around and it was time to hire new RDs to replace those that were leaving.  Since I was a current member of the Residence Life staff I was on the panel that interviewed the potential candidates. - this is where it gets good -  I was sitting in my supervisors' office minutes before an interview.  She mentioned the candidate's name and I thought the man's name sounded familiar.  

"Wasn't there an article about him in a recent Franciscan Way magazine?"  I asked.  We dug it out and there he was on the cover - Russ Blackstone (if only I could find it to show you...). - You just want confirmation from others that my hair was too long! (it truly was)  - He needed a hair cut (in my humble opinion, but I hear some ladies like the long and wavy locks look...) and was wearing a sweater that he had probably borrowed from Dr. Huxtable back in 1983 and had forgotten to give back... - really, was that necessary? -

I have since come to know (and mostly appreciate) that Russ wears clothes until they fall to pieces, so a surprising percentage of his wardrobe is still from the Huxtable era ;)

I honestly couldn't tell you what it was, but the interview with Russ left me totally underwhelmed.  - She still doesn't understand me :( - He wasn't wearing the sweater, but nonetheless, he didn't impress me.  He just didn't seem right for the job.  After the interview was over and my supervisor asked for our thoughts on the candidate, I was fairly vocal about how I felt.  "Don't hire him."  

She hired him.

And she put me in charge of training and mentoring him through his first year on the job.  - Lucky gal! -

Yep.

I wouldn't say I warmed up to Russ immediately, but at least after spending some time with him, I let go of my negativity toward him, and became more... indifferent.  - goodness, where is the love? -

I can recall a shopping trip we made to WalMart together to stock up on things for our dorms before the school year began.   On our way back out to his car, Russ "rode" the shopping cart down the hill of the parking lot to his car.  It clearly wasn't to be foolish or get weird attention; it was just because it was fun and he wanted to do it and have fun.  That's the kind of person Russ is.  I remember thinking, that's sort of fun and cute, but I would never do that.  And I don't. - We are talking one serious chick here (emphasis on serious)... -  I recall that cart ride as one of the first times I got a glimpse of who Russ truly was :)  

We worked well together and only clashed occasionally - like when I thought one of his residents should have received a severe penalty for something he did in my hall and Russ disagreed and took care of the situation in his own, less severe way.  I was angry. (Wow!  That about sums up our parenting differences when it comes to discipline around here.  Hmm... I never saw that correlation before...) - I'm telling you, our kids are lucky to have me :) -  But we mostly got along.  

And we started hanging out more with mutual friends.  Trips to the movies, games of ultimate frisbee (back when I used to run.) - yeah, and me.  Darn, I miss those running, frisbee days! -  Russ was an RD for two years and during his last summer there, renovations began on my hall, so I was forced to move over to a temporary apartment in his hall.  We hung out more - watched movies, had dinner, played ping pong.  (I should insert here that Russ is annoyingly good at every sport, and the fact that he "put up with me" and my very poor abilities playing any sport at all, was very charitable on his part :)  - Not charity, my love.  I had ulterior motives, ha, ha... -

Early in the summer, I had tickets for a Great Big Sea show in Buffalo.  (That was before they were playing big stages in the States, and this show was in a little Irish bar.)  I had no one to go with me, and I was looking for an excuse to spend more time with Russ, so I invited him to drive home with me - we'd get to go the show and check out Niagara Falls, which he had never seen.  He said yes :)  - I love adventures, but I was also very interested in meeting Theresa's family.  I was not disappointed.  They were close and loving and fun. -

I honestly don't remember too much about that trip, except that it was enjoyable.  And that Russ fell asleep in the Niagara Falls Butterfly Conservatory cafeteria.  I thought that was weird as I was just sitting there across from him, not sleeping. - wow, don't remember that.  Sounds kind of rude.  Sorry, babe! - I think we also may have gone horseback riding...

I was really falling for Russ, but was confused about whether to pursue it or not because he had recently accepted a job in Nicaragua.  I wasn't very experienced in the ways of love, but even my inexperience told me that it probably wasn't the best idea to start a relationship with someone who'd be moving to a third world country in a month.  In Confession, I admitted an "overwhelming distraction" even during prayer.  The object of my distraction?  A guy I'll never be with.  The priest encouraged me to pray that the Holy Spirit take the distraction from me so that I could refocus on prayer and let Russ go.  I prayed.  And I really believed I let him go.  And then... - I love this part... -

We had already been on a few hiking and camping trips with friends that summer.  On one particular trip to Old Man's Cave in Hocking Hills State Park, OH, there were five or six of us.  We had pitched our tents in a walk-in site, which meant that we had to walk quite a ways out to our cars if we needed anything.  On the first night, Russ offered to walk with me out to my car to get something I had forgotten. - once again, ulterior motives. Wait a minute.  Theresa did you really forget something or were you setting me up? -  We stayed out for a while, laying back on the hood of the car looking at stars and searching for satellites.  In a perfectly awkward moment, Russ said something that confessed his interest in me, and I said something equally clumsy that admitted it was reciprocated.  I don't remember much more of the conversation except the end when I started to think he was going to kiss me and I used evasive maneuvers to make sure that didn't happen.  Too much too soon :) - no need to explain, my love.  I was willing to let you play hard to get.. for a little while :) -

Later in the summer we did kiss, and we went out on our first date - P.F. Changs.  We didn't really go on "dates" a lot because we had known each other for two years already and already hung out so much that there was hardly the need for dates to "get to know each other."  If we happened to go out to dinner together, it didn't feel very different than when we had gone out to dinner together before we were dating.  (Does that sound weird?   We're not very romantic people.  At all.)  

Despite the kiss and the growing affection, I was still very hesitant.  Nicaragua still loomed.  One day, while relaxing on a park bench, Russ told me was going to back out of the job he had accepted to make our relationship a priority.  I freaked out. - she hid it well.  I remember discussing the pros and cons with her but never realized the red flags I had caused. -  I was excited that he wasn't leaving, but I was angry that he was backing out of an important commitment.   The words "warning," "not reliable," "not responsible," kept flashing in big red lights in my head.   But we stayed together and kept "dating."

The rest of the romance was pretty typical.  I think.  Russ left his RD job and took a position in Wheeling, WV in counseling.  He lived nearby while I stayed at the University for another year.  We had one significant break up where we didn't see or talk to each other for two months or so.  - we proved the adage absence makes the heart grow fonder! - The first time we saw each other again (dinner at a Chinese buffet) even though we still weren't officially back together, I knew he was the person I was going to marry.  (cheesy,  but true :) - we were both so comfortable with each other, conversation was so easy.  After that dinner I think I knew engagement was the next step too! -

Once we were back together, that was that.  We both knew we were heading toward marriage.  I felt like it was time to convince my family that Russ was wonderful.  I think my parents were a little wary at first, especially since he is so much older than me, and honestly because he's not the type of guy I/they ever thought I'd end up with :) - let's all be grateful she found a man who rides shopping carts in parking lots.  But I need her serious as much as she needs my fun. -  I could be wrong, but I think a turning point for my parents might have been a day when I called them and during the phone conversation I had Russ and his best friend sing a completely ridiculous song to them over the phone.  Russ is an avid barbershop quartet singer, and that is my family's kind of weird.  Good weird.  (If you don't know about good weird guys, look into it.  They make the best husbands. Everyone will tell you so :) )  

So that's that.  Or at least, that was the beginning of it all.  I can't tell you how it ends, but I can tell you the middle of the story involves a bunch of kids, a dented minivan, another near-relocation to Nicaragua, and a two story house in the city with a swing set, a tiny garden, and a bathtub faucet that's dripped for years.  Russ contributes the fun and spontaneity and I temper it with my serious, plan-ahead self.  It works.  It's been ten years, and I can happily stay we're still living a life full of love.  There's lots of that here too.  :) - And lots more to come.  I guarantee it! -  

A Girl, Her Brother, and the Plastic Animals

Last day of blog hopping :(  But one day left to link-up your own See Me Homeschool posts!

It was the kind of blog hop that encourages nosiness.  If you're anxious to spy on what a homeschool day is like for Gina or Charlotte, I encourage you to stick your nose into their posts from yesterday and today, at Someday (Hopefully) They'll Be Saints and Waltzing Matilda, respectively.  (It's ok, they're expecting you!)

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There is no reason for this post other than I love these photos!  

Sorry if these kinds of posts annoy you - no real thoughts or content, just cute kids (and subjectively, at that.)  I just don't want to forget these moments...

Embrace the Ordinary (vol 9)

Yesterday I noticed James had some food in his hair.  A thought popped into my head - just put him in the tub.  And then my eyes opened wide and I sat up straight.  I can't put him in the tub yet!  He's only had one bath in the sink! 

One bath.  A seven and a half month old baby.  One bath.  I occasionally wipe him down with a warm washcloth or wash his hair, but baths for the little guy just haven't been a priority like they were for my first couple of children.  

I've become a fairly non-sentimental slacker when it comes to iconic baby photo ops. But every baby should have a sink bath at least a couple times in his life and the pictures that go with it, right?   Even though James is sitting and sturdy, I felt like I needed to squeeze one more "infant" bath in before I moved him to the tub...  

Done.  He's definitely graduated.  Too big, too inquisitive, too active and splashy.  And he's outgrown the hooded baby towels.  Next time, (in another seven months, perhaps?)  he'll be in the bathtub :)

"...there is something holy, something divine hidden in the most ordinary

situations, and it is up to each on of you to discover it."

Passionately Loving the World, St. Josemaria Escriva

Linking up with Gina at Someday (Hopefully) They'll Be Saints!

I Dreamed a Dream of Nancy Drew

I dreamed that my some-day daughter would love her as much as I did.  (And in my dreams, Nancy will always be wearing a skirt and pumps.)

When I was a grammar school student, the library in the Catholic school I attended had old books.  Lucky me!  I bet you can figure out where you'd find me on library day - perusing and choosing one of the yellow-spined hardcover Nancy Drew mysteries.  I could hardly wait for library day every week so I could delve into new adventures with Nancy, George, and Bess.  I'd start to unravel the clues along with Nancy, speculate which bad guy was behind all the mayhem, and know that despite all the peril she put herself in, Nancy's brains would ensure that in the end, she would solve the crime and would live to tell the tale (and go out on another date with the dreamy Ned Nickerson!)

I loved mysteries and I loved Nancy Drew.  Back when I was in school, I don't think I ever wondered why I loved her.  But I was probably smart enough that if someone had asked me what was behind it all I could have told you that Nancy was confident, competent, considerate, kind, resourceful, educated, and not afraid of danger.  She knew how to do everything - tie knots, ride horses, drive a speed boat (not to mention her blue convertible), speak French, and wield a flashlight.  She always looked great.  She was using her brain and she was making a difference.  As an adult I think I can appreciate what the stories have to offer even a little more - loyal friendships, a doting father who gave Nancy the freedom to pursue her passion, the often life-saving value  of Nancy's confidence in herself and consideration for others, the fact that she was competent in such a variety of areas (none of which was acquired at college and narrowly geared toward a high-paying career), and the fact that Ned was in her life but was not a distraction and was not the object of everything she did. 

I don't ever remember being the type of girl that sat around dreaming of her future wedding, or planning what my house would look like when I grew up, or what the names of my some-day children would be.  But there was one thing I did dream... that my some-day daughter would read Nancy Drew and that a never-to-be-broken, sleuth-loving bond would be forged between us.  As I entered high school I had already seen that Nancy Drew was changing (In fact she bad been changing ever since her very introduction to girls in the 1930's.) Even at the dorky awkward age of 14 or 15 (incidentally, I usually still feel like I'm at a dorky awkward age...) I had the presence of mind to know that I wanted my some-day daughter to know and love the Nancy that I knew and loved.  It was the Nancy of the 1960's and 70s. (thanks to the school library with the old books!) The music department at my high school had a used book sale fundraiser one year, and what do you suppose I bought??  An entire box full of Nancy Drew's from the the 50's and 60's. (Who would give those away????)  Twenty years later, I found them still packed in the same box in which I first toted them home (my mother shaking her head in amusement that a high school sophomore just spent $10 on a daughter she *might* have!)    

I have that some-day daughter now.  In fact, I have two.  (with perhaps another on the way?!?!?)  And the box of books is waiting.  Some day these girls will be ready to curl up on the couch, tune out the hum of the rest of the household, and plead with me, "Mom, just one more page!" when I say it's time to set the table.  Nancy, who of course will be wearing a skirt, cardigan, and pumps, will have illuminated more than dark corners with her always-on-hand flashlight.  She'll have lit imaginations and a mother-daughter bond that I've dreamed about since before the "daughter" even was.  

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Afterward:

If you're a fellow Nancy Drew fan I know you'll love this book, Girl Sleuth: Nancy Drew and the Women Who Created Her,  by Melanie Rehak.  I read it about six years ago, but still recall how much I enjoyed it - the history the series, the format, the many writers all under the pseudonym of Carolyn Keene, the quarrels and lawsuits, and most of all the evolution of Nancy.  I was particularly fascinated with the details on how the character changed over time to suit the times - her personality, her dress, her hair.  It was also interesting to read about the changes that were made to the texts to reflect the changing cultural and societal norms, particularly in the areas of civil rights and women's rights.  

I admit that I haven't read many of the Nancy Drew stories that were written after 1980, but I'm not too upset about that.  I know that contemporary Nancy is far more concerned with her relationship with Ned and *gasp!* other young suitors.  I love her relationship with Ned in the old days - he was mature, strong, and accomplished, but he was not her rescuer, and she certainly was not chasing after him with fluttering eyes and a flirtatious smile.  The Nancy and Ned of old had a healthy, respectable relationship that my former-counselor husband would call love and admiration between two well differentiated people (laypersons talk - they weren't co-dependent or manipulative.)  I also know that contemporary Nancy has a cell phone and a hybrid car. Who knows - she might eve have a blog!  She may be a modern gal with politically correct sensibilities and a spare thought for the ozone layer...  

But I just want my daughters to love the Nancy that I love - the one with the blue convertible and the flashlight, the girl with the serious but not-a-distraction boyfriend, the girl who gets out of a jam with her brains, not a text message.  And the one with the skirts.  To me, she's not Nancy Drew without 'em :)

How We Weathered the Storm (mostly photos)

This blizzard?  Not so bad.  The last two days saw minimal snow but lots of way below zero temperatures, insane winds, and ice on the inside of our window panes.  Last night the snow hit us and Russ had the snow blower out before he left for work this  morning.  Now, at mid-morning, you can hardly tell he did all that work.  But we're good. In fact, we're better than good.  We've really been making the most the cold and snow... 

Remember all that white chocolate I ruined trying to make New Year's Eve candy?  Well, I saved it, that I did, and yesterday we turned it into snow cocoa:  7 cups milk, 12 ounces white chocolate, 1 tsp. vanilla, and 1/2 tsp. nutmeg.  Served with a candy cane and whipped cream, of course!  

An even better treat than the cocoa was that Russ got out of work an hour early - we were all very excited...

cozy socks and crocheting by the fireside - pretty much a perfect evening!

This morning after school lessons we made snow ice cream!  Check out this post from last year for the "recipe."

And I finally let the boys go out today... once it hit 12 degrees... 

Ruth painted while the boys were out...

Clare caring for her dry skin chin!  (could she be another chapstick addict like her mom?)

The kids got crazy in the basement (I don't photograph that behavior!)  and the rest of the time we just sat around and played...

Today ended with a very popular dinner - sausage and spinach egg scrambler and baked oatmeal with blueberry topping.  It's always breakfast-for-dinner on special days around here!

AND... just in case you've fallen for the illusion that everything here is snow-shine and roses and all we do is love the snow and being cooped up inside together, I will briefly mention that storm stir-craziness also got us - I lost my temper, everyone was in time out at one point or another (or was writing things like, "it is wrong to hit my sister" 10 - or 20 - times.), and the kids may have watched a few episodes of Feeding Time on Netflix.  Also - this pile of stuff is ever-present in our living room, but was tastefully avoided in all photos of fabulous family fun  :)  

It's real life here, people, I'm just trying to post the best parts of it!  

Happy snow days!

Dressing up for All Saint's Day!

Obviously, the real way to celebrate All Saint's Day (November 1, don't forget!) is to go to Mass.  And to offer thanks and praise for the "cloud of witnesses" bestowed upon us and the universal church.  And to recommit ourselves to delving deeper into the lives of the Saints for our own edification and sanctification. And to strive to follow their examples thereby personally drawing closer to Christ.  I *try* to do these personally and for my family.  But, couldn't I get even more out of it?? I mean, what about dressing up and partying and candy - those typically-done-at-the-end-of-October activities??  To really benefit from all that All Saint's Day has to offer, you really must combine all aforementioned activities.  Then you will truly be celebrating the Church Triumphant in grand style.  (and it's fun for kids too!)  

My kids chose their Saints a few weeks ago. (The party is tonight!!) When Ruth decided to dress the same as last year, my first thought was, "Oh, come on, choose something different, for fun!"  Then a little voice inside me said, "Why are you encouraging her to choose something that will require extra work on the part of the wardrobe department??" Since I am Mom and Costume Mistress, I agreed to let her be Our Lady of Guadalupe, again.

costume tips - I drew gold flower-y decorations on her "dress" with gold fabric pen,
and stenciled sparkly gold stars (fabric puffy paint, I think) on the veil.  Roses from the Dollar Store!

Aaron chose St. Michael the Archangel, presumably because the allure of armor and sword was too overpowering to do otherwise.

costume tips: chest plate and shield are from the Dollar Store.  The sword is made from wooden paint
stirrers that were spray painted and bound together with string.  The wings are a single piece of
poster board that I pinned onto the back of his shirts with two large safety pins.

Dominic chose St. Wenceslas - a repeat from three years ago.  I'm not entirely sure why he feels devoted to this particular first century Bohemian martyr.  But, we all enjoy the song of Good King Wenceslas, so that probably has something to do with it.  (Did you know that he was only considered a king after his death? It's true!)

costume tips: crown is metallic poster board with "jewels" glued on.  The cape I made three
years ago and I think I just cut a piece of purple fabric and sewed the faux fur with a
long  top stitch on my machine.  It's held together at the top with a large sew-on snap and again, I
glued the jewel on.

Clare?  Well, no big surprises there... we kept it obvious.  She is St. Clare.  Know how you get a previously-hysterical-when-approached-with-a-costume toddler to let you put a costume on her? Licorice.  

costume tips: I glued the host to the monstrance but then quickly sewed the entire thing onto her
habit.  Her veil is held on by a snap in the back - it probably won't stay on through
the whole party though, right?!  I tried to incorporate a white wimple, but she screamed bloody
murder and I backed down :)

And now, revealed here for the first time, exclusively for the readers of my blog, I bring you My Super Secret Tip for Saint Costumes...

I LOVE Saints that wore long robes or habits.  Every year, every Saint that I've ever dressed has required a long robe or religious habit.  My secret???  Men's T-shirts from Target. They are my inexpensive, no work required, go-to item for Saintly garb. Obviously, I save them from year to year, so Clare is naturally wearing St. Francis's habit from a few years ago.  But I needed to get a few new colors this year - the yellow for St. Michael and the BIG red one for St. Wenceslas.  I just love that a men's XXL shirt is the perfect royal robe for a pint-size king, long billowy sleeves and all! And because the warm weather is OVER, many of the T-shirts were marked down to $4.  Not bad when that's all you have to spend to pull together a perfect costume! Happy happy happy :)  Want to play spot the Target T-shirt???

And in case you're browsing for other easy Saint costume ideas, here are a few pictures of last year's costumes - St. Francis of Assisi, St. Dominic, Our Lady of Guadalupe, and St. Zita...

Happy All Saint's Day... a day early!